T journals
Failing femininity on a top of a mountain like:
25.07.2026
I recently made this friend. We don’t see each other often, but when we do, all we do is hike and talk. It’s like we’re excavating each problem with every step we take.
Every time we meet however, she tells me this one thing: “I have a small appetite”.
The first time she said those words, I already felt some discomfort in my body. You know this kind of wincing, this contracting of sort? I recognised it because it’s ancient, and it’s female. Small is better. Always, in every single way possible: small is better.
The second time she said it, I felt something different. It wasn’t even relevant to the conversation, yet there it was again: “I have a small appetite”.
I could feel anger mixed with frustration rising in me—not simply why do you keep telling me this but also and most importantly: what are you saying, exactly?
Recently, I went back on T, and for those of you who don’t know,
